Your problem is you

I’m sick of the moaning, seriously I am.  ‘Why can’t I have more money?’ ‘Why is this process so hard?’ ‘Why doesn’t the organisation do it this way?’ ‘Why does he/she behave that way?’ ‘I’ve been here a thousand years, why haven’t I been promoted?’. Why, why, why?

I’ll tell you why, it’s because of the following:

1. You lack self-awareness and want others to change instead

2. You lack the ability to grab accountability and make a difference

3. You want everything on a plate without doing any more to earn it

If you wake up every morning (you should celebrate that, by the way) asking yourself ‘why?’, the first question you should be asking yourself, is ‘what can I do to change this situation?’ and guess what, you can always do something because there isn’t a single person in the world who is the model employee and knows everything. So what can you do to change it?

  • Can you do that thing that is frustrating you in a different way?
  • Can you talk to someone in a different way?
  • Can you escalate your problem or ask someone (internal or external) for guidance?
  • Is there anything you can do to understand the situation/problem better?
  • Are you just reacting badly to a necessary change?
  • Do you understand what your priorities are?
  • Do you have any kind of plan – that you’re following – to get to the end of what you’re doing?
  • Can you just stop thinking about someone else and get on with doing your job to the best of your ability?
  • Should you just leave and get another job?

If you want the bigger, better job with more money and responsibility then chances are you’ll have to change.  Any kinds of increase (financial or status) will depend on your ability to lead, learn, inspire, encourage, fail, succeed and pass the credit back to the team; oh and to stop whining like a child being forced to eat liver (look, I just hated the texture of it, ok?).

This is how you get noticed. This is how you demonstrate your worth, gain respect and this is the way to contentment in your working life.

If you don’t want that contentment, then pack it in with the moaning during working hours and stop bringing everyone else down because you think the world owes you something. Show up at 9, sit in your corner, do your best, then leave at 5. If you have to moan about it, save it for your partner or pet because your problem isn’t your job, your problem is you.



7 thoughts on “Your problem is you

  1. Ah, consistent with my love of Covey. I always ask consultants to question ” can I control or influence this? ” Chances are they can. What they can always control is how they respond to circumstances. I hate liver too. Not just the texture!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ho, what an anti humane article this was. This should be served as “Turkish delight” to flossy lower ranking, sub divisional managers, who actually complain that employees are not appreciative of their ability or even their inability to lead people and deal with people.
    Well it’s no wonder that such mid to low manager who are underachievers are angry with the objective results of their own leadership. “The fish stinks (always) form the head” and that’s it! Instead of asking blame shifting questions to your subordinates inducing feather frustration to the pool try to score what you have promised to the shareholders and than bring your own achievements to the table of comparisons. On more “philosophy on the go” remember that people will always want something and if you are unable to give it to them or persuade hem otherwise may be someone else should lead.
    Just one man’s opinion – never mind me


    • Thanks for the response Emil and I think – although it’s hard to tell – you proved my point. The leadership team of any organisation creates the culture and the vision and if it can’t or doesn’t give you what you want, you’re the one who has to make the decision, don’t look for others to make it for you.


  3. Of course I have to add my two cents Colin :). I loved reading this article because the truth is I am guilty and its not the first time or the last time either. BUT my learning as you have described is “I am in charge” . I can indeed choose to do something about it and if I don’t I am doing myself a dis-service.

    Liked by 1 person


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